Is it Saturday yet?

Slept in today and then had school. We actually had a lecture for a little bit of class but as always we got to leave early. Since I've been home around 1pm-ish I've looked at a college website and that is all I've accomplished today. I could of done homework, chores, watched some tv but no none of that sounds interesting so now im getting irritated because I'm going crazy outta boredom. My mom is always like do something there is plenty to do but not if you cant sit still for any of it. I would even take a nap but I'm not tired. On days when I'm bored and just sit around I sometimes cut myself. So I'm really hoping I find something to do soon or that my parents come home right after work. I don't know. Also, tomorrow is back to work for 5 days in a row but I don't want to go. I have no choice but to go otherwise I lose my job and I need my job. However, I'm not use to having a consistent schedule so it drives me crazy to not have multiple days to myself. Like I hate having and job and school so I can never like go to the hospital for a "break" from the real world. It's nice in there not having to worry about where you need to be and such. Though, my parents would never let me go to the hospital again. They don't think people go in there just for a little break to get themselves back together....they say I need to do it all on my own while I'm balancing school and work. It sucks! Well I'm going to go because this is just upsetting me that I can't take care of myself.

I hope I'm not dreaming...

I got to go to my high school today and visit my favorite people. I havent mentioned to any of you that I wasnt allowed to visit really for the past two years after high school. I didn't leave my school on a good note and I needed help and they couldnt help me there. However, this summer I went and visited my principal. She's the lady in charge of when/who I get to visit. I filled her in on whats new in my life and she noticed a change in me. So that got me the privledge to visit the people I've been wanting to visit. It was so wonderful to see them all, we were able to have some good laughs. They said to check in with them in 3 months, whether they meant it or not who knows. What a great day!

jlo

Back to the Real World

So today is my last day of "vacation", meaning tomorrow is back to work. I'm excited to go back to making money. Today I had school and went to the library. I got Doctor Who season two, Law & Order SVU, Hoodwinked Too, and some Scooby-Doo movies! Yes I am 20 years old and want to watch Scooby-Doo, I even put Scooby-Doo on my Christmas list for this year. Now for another subject lets talk boys. Theres this guy that use to live a couple streets away from me and he had a crush on me in High School, then I believe it was after High School he asked me out but I turned him down. Then just a couple months ago I got interested in him but he was over me. However, now I believe he is back to being interested but I think all he is concerned about is getting sex. I'm not like that though. I'm not just going to have him ask me out and then the next day want to get in my pants. I guess you could say I'm old fashioned but I want to save myself for the right guy at the right time. I don't want to sleep around with billions of guys, I'm better than that! Oh, and good news! Perfect by Ellen Hopkins comes out tomorrow so my copy should be coming any day!. Well I think I'm going to go to bed now.

-jlo

Guess not....

I've been meaning to blog about this for a couple days now. Right now I'm hurting so nows a good time to talk about it. When you graduate High School everyone says you and your friends will go seperate ways. I said I wouldn't let that happen. There was this one girl I became friends with my freshmen year of high school. We had at least one class together I'm pretty sure every year so we grew close. The kids at school would ask if we were lesbians because we would hold hands and walk around. Truth is I loved her....like a friend, I could tell her anything. I thought she was my best friend. Then we graduated and she went to a university and I stayed close to home at a community college. We talked every once in awhile the first year and we tried to see each other when she was home. Then the second year she was away we became distant. I didn't want to accept it. I tried to talk to her and see her whenever she came home. However, this whole summer I only saw her once and that was at the end of the summer. I tried talking to this friend on facebook today and I didnt even get a response. So I guess we have just gone our seperate ways and it hurts so bad because I dont even know why. She failed me a lot as a friend I guess. I had to much faith in her I guess and so now it hurts to she im nothing to her. And if this friend happens to stumble upon this and read it and know its about her then I want to say I still love you, I think I always will but I know now that friends do become strangers eventually.....

jlo

Is It Bedtime Yet?

Hello World,

Today is an okay day I guess. I woke up this morning depressed for no reason (everyone tells me there has to be a reason but I slept fine so I dont know), then I went to work and on my cart was a razor blade; so I was staring at the blade being like this must be a sign telling me I can give in and cut. However, I didn't!  I kept the blade with me for my four hours of my shift and managed to ignore it. Also, I did not take the blade home, where it is currently located is unknown, this girl I work with had it last. Then after all that fun working I had to go to school afterwards. Class wasnt actually that bad we just fooled around with our student email accounts. But right now I have a killer headache and just want to lay on floor and sleep my days away. I don't want to slip back into my depression, I need to stay positive and kick butt at school but its hard.

-jlod

Allergies :(

Just came home from my brothers and can not stop sneezing. He has 3 cats and I'm pretty sure i'm allergic to them. This is the worst sneezing fit I have ever had. My trash can is going to be full of tissue by morning!Anyways what did I do today.....I managed to sleep in til 8am which was awesome and then I had to get ready for school. Class wasnt that bad it was just a lecture and learning how to use this program that are assignments are on. And when I got home I just caught up on some shows and went to my brothers to play some Halo Reach :)

8/27/11

So today is a pretty good day so far. We actually got a truck or maybe trucks in so we had stuff to stock for a change this week. By the way I work at a wonderful Menards as a Morning Stocker. My shift ended a couple hours ago so now I'm just waiting on my dad to finish up working on his van and then my parents and I are going to go to one of my favorite places for lunch (Dog N' Suds). I get the same thing every time I go there: cheeseburger, medium rootbeer, and mini mozarella stix. Sadly I've been there only once this summer and in a couple months they will close for the winter so I need to go like a billion more times still. Then my plans after that are to do some shopping with my dad and then I should read for school and do my two quizzes that are do tomorrow so I can get them done and over with. Well thats all I got for now so seeya!

-jlo